We Are Getting Back Together: Rekindle the Love

Rekindle may not be the best of words since love doesn't disappear. It just gets pushed to the back burner as other problems become the focus of your lives. However, the most valuable lesson you can learn is that if you give love with no obligation and without expecting anything in return it will be returned to you tenfold.

While communication does form an important part of putting your problems behind you and working on solutions for the future, it's also vitally important to learn what each other needs in order to feel loved by you.

 Rekindle the Love

This could be something as simple as learning to listen when one of you wants to talk, or spending time together laughing at silly movies, or it could be always remembering to hug each other before leaving. It makes no difference how big or how small the gesture, everyone has something they would appreciate you did for them to show them you care.

If you and your ex have only just started seeing each other once again, be sure to take things slowly. Don't arrange to see each other every single day, but try for perhaps a couple of times a week. This gives you both a chance to miss each other during the days when you don't speak, but it also creates a sense of anticipation for the next date.

Plan fun dates together that highlight the enjoyment you get out of each others company. These don't have to be expensive outings. You might decide to stay in and watch a fun movie, or take a walk along the beach, or meet up with friends. Do whatever feels fun and natural so you both begin to remember the good times more often than the bad.

Make sure you keep the deep and meaningful stuff to a minimum at this point. After all, you want to build a long term relationship based on mutual love, trust and respect here, but it's also important to remind each other of how much you enjoy each others company.

The difficulty with this phase of getting your ex back is the temptation to call them all the time to check who else they're with or what they're doing when they're not with you. Men and women can often find this kind of constant calling and jealous questioning to be a sign of desperation or mistrust. These signs can often make your ex believe it’s just too difficult to pursue you any longer and back away again.

Learn to trust that your ex is still easing slowly back into the relationship, so be sure to extend a little faith that you're the person your ex really wants to be with and allow each other a bit of space between dates.

As time passes, your ex should realize that you really are the person of his or her dreams. You'll notice contact becoming more regular and dates becoming more frequent. When you notice this happening, you'll know your ex is back.
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