Intimacy To Keep Your Love Alive and Well

Give Him or Her a Massage

Not every kind of being physical; involves sex.  For instance, holding hands is a sweet way to connect that doesn't imply anything more than it is.  Dancing is another way to connect physically without sex.

Similarly, giving your partner a massage can be sensual and sexy without involving sex.

The goal is to celebrate sensual intimacy independent of sexuality.  A massage doesn't have to be a seduction.  The goal is good feelings that aren't genitally centered.  You want to feel warm, happy and contented – not sexual.

Don’t treat a massage as a quid pro quo.  It's a gift.  Maybe later your partner will want to give you a gift of massage.  But right now it is something you are giving him or her.

We Are Getting Back Together

You'll want to get some good massage oil for the massage.  Then find a flat surface in a comfortably warm room.  A bed will work, but you don't want to ruin expensive sheets and towels.  Find some soothing music and soft lighting.

You can choose to give a full body massage or a less intimate one.  If you are giving a full body massage, remember to include the hands and feet.  It’s a good idea to exclude genitalia when giving the gift of a massage and always offer the option of underwear kept on.

If you aren't at a sexual stage of a relationship, you can offer a hand and foot massage as an alternative to a full body massage.

Plan to spend at least an hour on the massage.

If you are unsure about how to give a massage, you can get a good book from the book store, take a class, or practice on a friend first (who will love being your practice object!)

Michelle and Brian decided to take a couple's massage class together.  It was a fun way to get out and meet people.  But it also strengthened their relationship because they developed a practical skill that they could use in their relationship.

Now they love to give – and receive – massages and they feel that they are competent in giving them.  They feel like they save hundreds of dollars a year in masseuse fees and give each other a special gift at the same time.

Shampoo and Bathe Your Love

In many cultures, baths have had ritual status both as a way of purifying but also of relaxing and celebrating.

There is something very loving about washing someone.  The warm water, soap and bubbles take us back to being cared for and pampered and loved.

A long, careful, gentle shampoo is sexy.  Get some scented candles and soft music to go along with it.

While a shower has its own sex appeal, that’s not what were talking about here.

Bathing together when there is a hygiene problem on the part of one partner can be a fun and nifty way of bypassing those less than romantic odor discussions.

You can also make bathing independent of lovemaking.  In fact, it may be even more romantic when it is independent of sex.  Play geisha girl or boy to your loved one.

Ps. Take Care of yourself and your relationship and it may last forever. Need some emergency advice about
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We Are Getting Back Together: Getting Back Together - Phase II

You may find that your partner calls you first and in this case try and act pleased to hear them, not angry or desperate. You should avoid pushing them into a situation where they have no choice or attempting to make them feel guilty as this will ruin any chance of you getting back together.

If they do call, this is an excellent opportunity to propose that you meet, preferably over dinner, so you can discuss matters further. Or you can adopt another strategy that may give you a little more time and that is to say that maybe they were right and you both need some breathing space but that you would like to remain friends. This will give you time to start rebuilding the relationship from the foundation up.

So, if you are at the stage where you have both agreed to be just friends for now you can use this opportunity to create a stronger bond between the two of you. It is the perfect time to find out how they want their needs to be fulfilled. In essence you need to rebuild trust so that they can have their need for certainty satisfied which you probably need as well.

 Getting Back Together - Phase II

Rebuilding trust is a two way street and you must both accept your share of the problem as well as forgiving each other. Even if it seems that only one side is to blame, often the actions of one person can be in reaction to some things the other person did or didn't do.

For example, you may have grown distant because you didn't feel loved or that you came first to your partner but he or she doesn't know this because of lack of communication. You both need to be honest with each other.

If you want trust you also must give trust, in other words do what you would like done unto you so you have to be willing to take the first step and have faith in both your partner and the relationship.
Ps. In essence you may say that what you give is what you give: in relationship and in life in general but things may get a little to complicated to sort out by yourself. >Read how 50,119 people found love again!<

We Are Getting Back Together: Contacting Your Ex

The biggest problem most people dealing with break ups face is trying to figure out why their ex won’t speak to them about what went wrong. Most people's first instinct is to call or send a text message to ask what happened or to try and plead with their ex to reconsider.

Each time you do contact your ex, you're subtly telling him that you're not capable of existing without him. While this might sound romantic and noble in a Hollywood film, in reality you're sending your ex a sure sign of your insecurity and high dependence.

Think back once again to when you first met. You would have been happy and fun to be around. You would have been quite happy to do things for yourself in your own life, deal with your own things and generally be independent.

Contacting Your Ex

Now consider all those desperate pleas to get back together, crying and swearing your undying love for your ex.

Your ex will be seeing someone completely different sitting there than the person he fell in love with, so the more you call or text or email, the less likely it is that he'll want to talk.

Stop contacting him at once.

Spend some time reconnecting to the person you used to be. Build up your own self-esteem once again and start going out with friends to take your mind off things. Such simple advice is almost never taken seriously by someone who is so desperately wanting to keep in contact with their ex, afraid that if they don’t speak to him, he might meet someone else.

Unfortunately, it's good advice. Give your ex some time to miss you. Give him a little space to make him understand what he's lost and what life is like when you're not around. You don't have to wait weeks and weeks. Just give him a little time to see what it's like being apart.

When you're feeling a little happier about who you are and what you really want, only then give him a call and suggest you meet for a friendly chat. Meet somewhere public and make sure it's relaxed. Have plenty of casual, light-hearted topics planned for conversation and avoid talking about the relationship. You want your ex to see that you're capable of taking responsibility for your own happiness and not completely dependent on him to provide it for you.

When he does see the original happy, bubbly person he fell in love with sitting there opposite him instead of the crying, upset, miserable person he didn't know how to help, he’ll begin to realize that he did miss you after all.
Ps. Consider this helpful guide to take the next step in getting your ex back in your life.
>The Magic Second Chance Letter<

We Are Getting Back Together: What Do You Want When You Get Your Ex Back

Clearly you want your ex back if you are reading this article. However, what we need to look at is why. Are you absolutely sure it is because you love them? Or could it be because you are afraid of being alone?

After being in a relationship for a while everyone becomes dependent, to a degree, on their partner. This emotional attachment or dependence is what keeps relationships together when sometimes they should have long been over. So you need to look inside yourself and objectively analyze why youwant this person back.

Is it really love or is it pride that they were the one to end things before you? This can be a difficult question to answer. But if you close your eyes an visualize your life in 15 or 20 years and your partner is not there, how do you feel? If your reaction is a gut-wrenching pain then it could very well be love. However, if your answer is that you either can't visualize or your feelings are rather vague then forget about your pride and move on.

What Do You Want When You Get Your Ex Back

Since we all do things to either avoid pain or gain pleasure the question you need to ask yourself is two questions:

Do you link pleasure with their presence?

Do you link pain with their absence?

You may think they are both the same things but there’s quite a large distinction between the two.

If you are focusing more on the pleasure that results from their presence, then you truly do want them in your life as a person and a partner. However if you are focusing on the pain of their absence and how miserable you’ll feel if you’re alone, this may be purely because everyone needs a connection and what is really hurting you is being alone, not necessarily being without the other person.

You have to ask yourself whether you are afraid of going out into the big world alone because you have been so used to being part of a couple. Your pain may be linked to a fear of starting out again and connecting with other people.

However, if your painful feelings are linked to being without your partner and you feel without a doubt, after a little introspection, that you can't live without them, then you need to understand what went wrong so you know what needs to be fixed.

Do not expect it to be an easy journey because everything in life requires commitment. You may discover things about yourself that are painful, but if you truly wish to change and rekindle your lost love then you need to stay the course.
Ps.The way to stay the course and get your ex back is the magic second chance letter which is within The Magic of Making Up Course.<Free Video here>

I Want My Ex Back Girls Let Guys Be The Hunters

Do you find yourself saying “I want my ex back”?  Do you feel like something is missing because he’s not around?  Do you feel lonely as a single person.  Well, this article is for all you gals who say I want my ex back.

First of all, do not, whatever else you do, chase him.  Men are supposed to be the hunters.  When you chase him, it actually makes you a lot less attractive.  You need to seduce him with your feminine wiles which have nothing to do with the chase.

In fact, he needs to chase you.  That’s what men do.  Men hunt, women choose.  When you get this through your head, you will begin to understand how to get him back.

So, start by analyzing what brought you together in the first place.  What was it that he saw in you that was so appealing?  Do a harsh assessment of yourself.  Have you gained a few pounds, done something stupid with your hair, or changed the way you dress?  All of these things could have an impact on how he sees you.

When you say I want my ex back, you are bringing another person into your life.  When he asked you out, you were a single person.  But as you started dating, you became a couple.  In the process, you probably gave up some hobbies, friends, or activities.  In short, you changed.  You stopped being the girl he initially dated.  He may have become bored with the new you – the you that you changed into for him.  One way to get him back may be just to take up the old you so that you are appealing again.  And then, don’t change this time.

Another thing that could have happened was that he really liked you without knowing you.  You were mysterious.  But, as you became a couple, he found out things about you that he didn’t like.  Perhaps he found out that you swear, and that goes against what he thinks is appropriate for his girlfriend.  Think about the things that he harped on you about.  If you are really saying I want my ex back, consider making the changes he asked for.

Once you have all of the pieces in place – you are the girl he really wants – then you have to seduce him.  But doing this is counterintuitive.

Remember – he likes the chase.  So, give him one!  Go somewhere that he often goes and barely acknowledge him, but flirt outrageously with all of the other guys.  If some guy makes a move, be sure to get cozy.  Your ex boyfriend may confront you – or the guy – about this.  Remind him that you are no longer his girlfriend and he doesn’t have a say.  You can even start dating one of his friends so that he will want to chase you down.

Once the hunter gets his juices riled, he will want to come after you.  At that point, it is up to you to keep him interested by being the girlfriend he really wants.  That way you won’t be saying “I want my ex back” again!
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