We Are Getting Back Together:Article 4 Finding Someone Special To Spend Your Life With

We Are Getting Back Together Articles

Method 3 - Laser Targeted Dating

Laser Targeted Dating is dating for keeps. This describes Lydda's situation in the first article. She wants to cut to the chase and find a partner to settle down with. The methods described in this section are the most efficient way to find a long term relationship leading to marriage.

Going up to someone in a bar and asking them about their relationship goal is not really appropriate (or, quite frankly, productive). Even if she's been dating someone for a few weeks, Lydda would be wise not to ask about marriage plans. But there are methods that allow her to restrict the people she meets to a certain relationship goal and exchange relationship goal information with dates prior to meeting. This will allow her to skip over anyone who is incompatible with her goals before they get involved.

Personal Ad

One of the things she can do is take out a personal ad. Rather than answering other's ads, it is best for her to take out her own. Look at the ads published by others to get an idea about what works. She should also check out several publications or online sites so that she ensures that the kind of person she's looking for is also the kind of person who is advertising.

The first thing she should do is set up a special email address, phone number, or P.O. Boxes to receive responses. That way, she won't mind dumping the account if someone she does not like begins to bother her.

In her ad, she should describe her personality, describe a couple favorite activities, and state her relationship goal. She might also briefly describe the man she is looking for, depending on space limits. Her ad needs to stand out from the crowd. You can use humor or poignancy to achieve this.

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She should get a single, platonic guy pal to look at the ad and make suggestions so that she can see how a man responds to it.

When Lydda gets a response, she should chat on the phone or online for a while. She needs to get a sense of the guy before she meets him in person. She should refrain from giving any identifying data including last name, address, or work place right away. Once she gives a guy this information, she can't take it back.

If she does want to give him a phone number at some point, she might consider buying a prepaid cell phone just for this purpose. That way, if he becomes a pest – or worse – she can just dump the phone.

Once Lydda has found someone she wants to go out with, she should always meet for the first time in a public place during the day. She should plan to keep the first meeting short (coffee is a good idea) and she should drive herself to and from the date. She should tell a friend where she'll be and giver her the date's name, address and phone number.

Personal ads are more accepted now than they once were. They're inexpensive and work well for people with more time than money. In fact, Craigslist offers a whole section on personals for free.

If Lydda places the ad herself, she is going to have to do all of the sorting and screening of responders herself which can be time consuming. If she decides to be a responder instead, she is going to write many replies that never get an answer back.

Article 5 in this series of articles on "Finding Someone Special To Spend Your Life With"  will focus on other methods of how to do Laser Targeted Dating. I highly recommend this top notch site for more professional relation advices.

We Are Getting Back Together:Article 3 Finding Someone Special To Spend Your Life With

Method 2 - Efficient Dating

Cynthia really wants to settle down again. She feels lost without being part of a couple. But the smart thing for her to do right now is to date around and get a feel for adult dating. Here are some ways she can meet some eligible men without having to commit to marriage again right away.

One of the best things she could do is ask friends and family to hook her up with eligible men. The people who know her and care about her are going to look after her interests when they make an introduction.

While a “blind date” can be a scary thought, it's actually safer than meeting people in most other ways. There's always a human connection so the odds of her date being a mad rapist is extremely low.

Cynthia should thank the friend who set the date up no matter what the outcome is. That will keep whatever supply there is flowing. She should remember though that her friends have a limited supply of friends! At some point she's going to run out of date referrals and need to move on to other methods.

In many communities, there are a good number of singles-specific events. These include dances, parties, dinners, progressive dinners, volleyball games, softball leagues, and outdoor activities. The good thing about singles-specific events is that you know everyone there is single and are looking, if only casually, for a date.

Larger cities tend to have more formal arrangements for single's dating. But you can still find opportunities to mix and mingle in cities and towns of all sizes.

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Many of these single's specific activities are orchestrated by professional companies that do nothing but event planning for the single set. There are a number of targeted dating services as well. If you want to date someone within your own religion, date other people who have children, or meet someone with specific interests (baseball or science fiction), there's an event out there for you.

The downside to these events is that anyone can come. The groups organizing the events don't conduct background checks and sometimes married people come to scope out the market. Smaller more personal events tend to attract the more serious daters.

Cynthia should have a genuine interest in the events she attends. Otherwise she could end up meeting a man at a Super Bowl Fanatics party and later end up a football widow. If she goes to a dance and hates dancing, she may meet someone she really likes and then disappoint him by telling him she doesn't want to go dancing ever again.

A new phenomenon in Singles Specific events is Speed Dating. These events generally cost $20 to $50 and range in size from 7 people of each gender to 50 people of each gender. The sponsors try to have the same number of people from both genders.

In a typical scenario, there will be 10 men and 10 women. The women will sit at tables while the men will rotate through all 10 tables. They will have 7 minute “dates” where they can find out whether there is any interest. At the end of the evening, they fill out a card stating who they would like to see again. Where there is a “match” - that is both parties have indicated interest – the contact information will be forwarded to both parties.

Cynthia will meet several potential dates in one evening and have time to actually talk to each one. Direct questions are permissible and even encouraged. She can ask questions about employment, money, dating objectives and the like. This can save her gobs of time which would have been wasted going out on each of these dates on successive nights.

There's no guarantee that she'll meet anyone she feels attracted to. The more “specialized” the group, the better her chances are. So, she might want to attend a Catholic Speed Dating Night or a “40 Somethings” Speed Dating Night to increase her chances of compatibility.

Another thing Cynthia should consider is to log on to an internet chat room. When she's feeling lonely, she can go online and chat with someone who is also looking for some online companionship.

She should be aware that she can't always trust what people say about themselves online. If she's intending to meet the person in the “real” world, she should make sure that it is at a very public place and that she has her own means of transportation.
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We Are Getting Back Together:Article 2 Finding Someone Special To Spend Your Life With

Casual Dating

Jerome, in our example from the introduction, is looking for something to do, but is not looking to get married in the near future. While it is possible he'll meet his soul mate this summer, the likelihood is that he'll go away in the fall and forget about the girls he went out with. Instead, he's looking for friends and dating around.

There are lots of ways for him to meet other teen agers. He can go to fairs, festivals, ethnic celebrations, harvestfests, Octoberfests (okay, I know I said it was summer, but you get the idea), concerts, sing-alongs, sporting events, flea markets, stamp shows, Civil War reenactments, zoos, and amusement parks. Basically, if he indulges his special interests, he'll meet others who share the interests.

These events will allow him to see his community and regional area while making friends who share his interest.

The crowds tend to be mixed in age and marital status so it can be difficult to differentiate who is attached from those unattached. Large crowds tend to include people who have brought dates or friends, so it can be hard to break into a closed circle. The shear volume of people and noise level can also make meeting people more difficult.

Jerome's best bet is to bring a buddy to these events so that he has a better chance of running into people who are there doing the same thing. He'll probably meet more people if he goes with a friend than if he goes by himself.

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If Jerome doesn't know any activities that are going on beyond the world of his high school, he can contact his local chamber of commerce, read the calendar or weekend editions of local newspapers, and check bulletin boards and online sites for special event schedules.

Another place for Jerome to look is at church events. That doesn't mean he has to go to the 9 a.m. Sunday service either. Most churches hold activities open to the public including mainstays such as potluck dinners and carnivals but also including special events or dances for singles of all religions.

People at church events tend to be positive, warm hearted and emotionally supportive.

Jerome might look around for a "just for fun" class. He'll be taking a full academic load majoring in Engineering in the fall, so now is the time to do something fun like taking a cooking class or joining a hiking group.

These kinds of things can expand his mind, help him get in shape, and make him a more interesting person.

To find these kind of classes, look at universities and colleges, community centers, park districts, YMCAs, museums, churches, and all kinds of clubs.

Article 3 in this series of articles on Finding Someone Special To Spend Your Life With will focus on Method 2 - Efficient Dating .
Ps. Read how 50,119 people found love again!

Surviving A Breakup - Write It Down

Right after a relationship ends, surviving a breakup might seem an impossible task. It hurts so much, and it’s easy to think that you’ll never feel happy again. It’s also easy to think that you might never find someone else. A good step to take when surviving a breakup is to start writing all these feelings down.

Journaling is something that millions of people do every day for a variety of reasons. Some people have kept diaries since they were children. At first they simply wrote down the important things that happened that day. Many children’s diaries are just filled with little lists about what they did all day.

As people get older, their journals and diaries tend to become more introspective. They write about an event and how it made them feel or what they thought it meant. Sometimes they write about how they think a certain event might affect them in the future.

Journaling or keeping a diary can help with surviving a breakup by giving you an outlet to express yourself. You can write things down that you might be uncomfortable saying to someone else. Embarrassing things or things that really upset you so much that you don’t really want to tell anyone can be “told” to your diary.

Many people never start journaling because they don’t think they know how. But there really is no special way to do it. You don’t have to have a special diary or journal to begin. You can write in a regular notebook or keep a file on your computer for your thoughts.

But you can purchase a special book to write in if you want. It can be as casual or as formal as you choose. If it makes you happy, purchase a special journal with a pretty cover and fine paper inside. If not, grab a spiral notebook or open that file in your word processor and start a journal.

As you’re surviving a breakup, when you feel especially sad write about why you think that is and what you think you can do about it. When you’re missing your ex, write about it. It’s okay to cry or feel upset while writing. In fact, it’s good to do so. You’re getting it out.

You don’t have to write in your journal every day. You don’t have to start every entry “Dear Diary” or do it in any specific way. You might scrawl down one sentence, “I hate this!” and three days later write 5 pages of things you won’t miss about your ex and why you’re glad it’s over. All of these are good for you.

Another way to use writing to help get over a relationship is to write a letter to your ex. Write down everything you want to say to him or her, good and bad, and be brutally honest. Now that you’ve purged yourself, throw the letter away.

Surviving a breakup can be made easier by writing down and dealing with your feelings, so give it a try.

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Surviving A Breakup - 3 Things To Help

Surviving a breakup can feel impossible, especially if you didn’t really want the relationship to end. But even if you were the one who decided it was over, it can feel crummy to have such an important part of your life end. There are three important things you can to help with surviving a breakup.

First, let yourself be sad. It’s natural to not want to feel sad. None of us likes to be upset or depressed. But when a relationship ends, no matter who ended it, you lose a part of your life. If you haven’t been dating long, the sad period probably won’t last that long. But for a long-term relationship, you might be sad for a long time.

It’s important, as painful as it is, to allow yourself to feel that way. The tendency is to avoid those feelings and try to move on to something that feels better. But being sad is a necessary step in the healing process.

Letting yourself feel the sadness will let you deal with the emotions and the pain. Remember that surviving a breakup is more than just moving on. If you can deal with the bad feelings, you’ll be better to able to experience the good feelings that come when you’ve moved on.

Second, keep busy. You have to deal with the sadness and not deny it or push it aside, but that doesn’t mean you can or should let yourself wallow in it. If you feel like spending the entire day in bed crying, you can let yourself do that. But the next day, even if you feel that way again, make yourself do something else.

Let yourself cry for an hour, and then find an activity to help distract you. Even if it’s only watching a movie, at least you’ll be able to concentrate on something else for brief periods of time.

Keep in mind that no matter how “active” your activity might be, sad thoughts and memories will still creep in. Even if you’re solving a hard puzzle and concentrating to distract yourself, now and then a memory will pop up and your mind will be back on the breakup. This is normal.

You just have to deal with the feeling briefly and not let it sidetrack you. Feel it, cry for a bit if you need to, and then keep concentrating on your activity. Soon, the sad thoughts and feelings will pop up less and less when you’re doing other things.

Finally, decide to forgive your ex. Surviving a breakup isn’t just about leaving one relationship and looking for another.

You need to resolve things in the old relationship to help you be more emotionally healthy in the next relationship. If you were hurt in the relationship, forgive your ex for his or her part in that.

This might seem an impossible task. Start by realizing that it really does take two, and that surviving a breakup is more important than having someone to blame for it.

Ps. Read more here!

Top 3 Reasons Why Men Dump Women

No one likes to be rejected.  This is especially true for women. One form of rejection is being dumped by the person whom you really love or are in a relationship with. Being dumped is never fun.  It can be the source of a great deal of pain, confusion, anger, and hurt.

There was a time when women were the ones who did the vast majority of dumping.  However, this certainly isn't true anymore.  Men, increasingly, are dumping women.  As a woman, who has been dumped, you may not fully understand the motives behind his actions.  Men are not quite as complex as women, when it comes to these sorts of things.  This article was written to help you find some of the answers to the question of “why men dump women?”

Here are the top three reasons of why men dump women:

1.Lack of Communication

Communication is very important in every relationship. A lack of communication would definitely mean the end of a relationship. Hence, it is often cited as one of the top reasons of why men break up with the woman they are with.

2.Women Become Demanding

Another reason why women are dumped by men is because as time goes by, they become more and more demanding.  Women, Western women in particular,  have a tendency to try and control anything and everything about the relationship, sometimes even the man himself.  They often will try to set rules and limits on their male counterpart.  Women often will give the men a hard time about them hanging out with their friends, what they watch on T.V., working late, etc...Some men will tolerate this type of behavior.  However, the ones that finally get fed up with it, and end it, usually cite this as a reason why they broke up.

 3.Being Too Reliant On Men

There are times when women become too clingy, needy, and reliant on their man.  Its okay for a woman to play up the “damsel in distress” routine once in a while.  In fact, most men enjoy playing the role of “hero.”  However, it can be taken too far and becomes quite annoying if done on a regular basis.  Most men want a woman who is independent, and can make decisions on her own.  Some women insist that the man spend every free minute of every free day with her.  It is healthy for people in a relationship to have lives outside the relationship.  If the woman makes the man the center of her life and becomes too obsessed, it usually will be too much for the man.

Indeed, it is not only women who hold the power to dump men because men also have that power.  These reasons are by no means conclusive.  There are many reasons why men dump women.  The best thing you can do if you were dumped by a man, is to learn from your mistakes, and try not to repeat them in the next relationship.

Ps.Take action and click here for expert advice!

Use Boyfriend Girlfriend Quizzes For Fun Not Advice

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can be fun to take. You can find them in many different magazines aimed at women, and all over the Internet. There will be a set of questions that can vary from asking about your favorite thing to do together, to how much you know about your boyfriend’s past girlfriends. But boyfriend girlfriend quizzes are really just mean to be fun, not some sort of couple therapy. So have fun with them!

Some are designed for you to take in which you’ll answer questions about your boyfriend only. Based on your answers about things like how often he says he loves you, or how often he takes you out, you’ll get an answer. Many of these quizzes are a bit tongue in cheek, and are designed just for fun. So if you get a bad answer, look closely at the quiz.

If the possible answers you could have selected are all a bit wild and exaggerated, then it’s more a joke quiz than something you could really just your relationship by. Very often, multiple choice quizzes are designed this way, with humorous or outrageous choices for you to choose between. These are clearly just for fun.

Some quizzes have you answering questions about what you think your boyfriend is thinking. While these can be fun too, realize that you can’t read minds. No matter what you think he might say or do, you can’t be sure. So don’t take these results too seriously.

Boyfriend girlfriend quizzes that want yes or no answers are more likely to attempt to give real advice. Judging by how many yes and no answers you give, the quiz will give you a quick assessment of your relationship.

These can be a little more accurate if the questions are reasonable ones. Just a quick read of the questions and the possible results should let you know if it’s meant to be humorous or they’re really trying to give relationship advice. Watch the tone of what they say if it’s difficult to tell.

Then there are those quizzes that are designed for you take together. Or that intend for you to ask your boyfriend questions. If your boyfriend thinks it sounds like a fun idea, then by all means enjoy it. But if he’s resistant to the idea of boyfriend girlfriend quizzes, don’t force the issue.

Even though you’re aware of the type of quiz it is and decide to do it just for fun, he might take it too seriously. There’s always the chance that with even the most tongue in cheek quiz, you’ll get a “bad” answer. And no matter how silly the questions or the possible answers, he might not understand that it’s just a joke and could take it as a criticism.

On the other hand, don’t take a quiz and then make too much of the answer yourself. No matter how serious they’re intended to be, boyfriend girlfriend quizzes can’t really accurately tell you anything you don’t already know!
Ps. How to get my girlfriend back.