Get the Timing Right When You Break Up

There is never a "good"time to break up with a girl. But, there are some times that are worse than others. For instance, breaking up with a girl just before Christmas, Valentine’s Day or her birthday really sucks! (This is especially true if you just don't want to buy her a present.)

If she has major events in her life going on, it may be best to wait until after they have been resolved. For instance, if you have been in a long term relationship with a girl and she has her comprehensive exams for a master's degree coming up in two weeks, it would probably
be the gentlemanly thing to do to wait.

Perhaps no life event is more stressful than having a major medical happening. Don't be like former House Speaker Newt Gingrich who presented the divorce papers to his first wife when she was recovering from Breast Cancer surgery. Not only does this make you a cad, it makes you look like a cad!

But recognize that there’s always something going on, both in your life and in hers. If you delay the break up for a specific event and then find there is another event on the horizon, at some point you are just going to have to bite the bullet and call the whole thing off, whatever
the circumstances.

Places to Break Up and Places to Avoid Breaking Up

Figuring out where to break up can be as difficult as finding the words to say. But selecting the proper break up venue is critical.

First of all, you never, ever want to break up in a car. The reason why is pretty obvious: it could be dangerous! But, there is also the consideration that neither of you can walk away when tensions are high.

Most car break ups aren't planned. A typical car break up is more of a spontaneous outburst, perhaps with an underlying intent to break up soon.

For instance, you are at a party and you see her flirting with another guy. You have been thinking about breaking up with her already, but this really gets your goat. So, on the way home (after having a couple of drinks no less), you start arguing. She says she was just
being friendly. You accuse her of having an affair with the guy. Pretty soon, you are shouting at each other. The car is swerving all over the road. She's crying. And you finally say, "I’ve
had it. We’re through."

This is not the best way to break up!

Another bad way to break up is when you avoid doing it in person. Whether you send a letter, text, email, or make a phone call, you're hiding behind technology. Not only does this make you a coward, but she's going to tell all of her friends what a coward you were.

Besides, Britney Spears broke up with Kevin Federline by email. Do you want to be so Britney?

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We Are Getting Back Together: Communication-You Must Communicate

The first step to rebuilding a relationship is to communicate and tell each other what you have been holding back. You have to share everything with each other both the bad and the good, and this is not something you do just once.

Communication is what will keep your love alive and investing in your relationship will make it thrive. Even ten minutes per day of quality time with your partner where you just talk about how you both feel can do wonders to rebuild the passion and to keep it alive.

You will both have to break through your fears and limiting beliefs so that you can move forward. Stop relying on anger as a means to satisfy deep emotional needs and replace it with love. If you feel you can't do this then just close your eyes and imagine your life without that person. What is more painful? Being without them or being wrong? If the answer is the former then realize that your negative responses will only serve to create greater pain by pushing them away from you again.

Communication - You Must Communicate

If you have a deep pain that you don't even realize affects your actions you need to open up to your partner, to allow them to help you through it with their love and support. Explain to them what you need from them, that you need them to be there for you and demand the same of them. Tell them you need them to be open and honest with you so you can both move forward to a life of total bliss in a relationship based on complete and total trust that is full of love and support.

Rebuilding a relationship requires commitment and you both need to realize that a relationship is essential to your happiness as there is nothing more wonderful that sharing deeply with another person. Nothing that is worth anything in life can be obtained without complete commitment and this also holds true for relationships.

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