Getting Over A Breakup: Friends To The Rescue

It is not easy to cope when a marriage or an important relationship ends. The whole world seems upside down and there is a lot of emotional trauma and unsettling feelings. It is also believed that it is tougher for women to get over a breakup than it is for a man. You must, however, remember that it is not the end of the world and the agony caused by a breakup is not insurmountable.



Lean On Your Friends

Friends often prove very helpful in making you feel better. We tend to feel lonely after a breakup and sharing our feeling with a close friend might ease the emotional burden. Hang out with friends; watch a TV show or a movie and it will work wonders. Don’t stop your tears in front of an understanding and patient friend as it is the best way to let go of the emotional burden and pain.

Your friends are aware of your personality and understand what you are going through. So true friends will always stick close to you in this terrible time and also help you get out of it as they know what will make you happy.

Sometimes you blame yourselves for whatever has happened and suffer from immense guilt. A true friend will never let you fall into that trap and will make you realize that whatever happened was not your fault.

Getting Over A Breakup: Friends To The Rescue

Take Up New Interests

When you are in a relationship you tend to lose your social circle, so now it is the right time to get it back. You must catch up with old friends and make an effort to reach out to new people. This will make you emotionally more secure and boost your courage. You can also join a dance class or any activity class with a friend who shares your interest as it will prove to be helpful in keeping you busy and your mind will drift from the painful memory of your ex.

Grow and Learn

At the time of this emotional crisis you should search for an opportunity to grow and learn. A vacation with friends is another great idea, as it will temporarily take you away from the things that will remind you of your partner. Besides this, a vacation is always rejuvenating for your mind and soul.

Gain Back Your Confidence

It is very hard for us to deal with breakup and we also tend to find faults with ourselves and tend to suffer from inferiority complex. Some of us might think that they are unattractive and this may be a reason their partner has dumped them. Sharing complexes with friends is very important because they know your inner beauty and will make you feel beautiful by their words and actions. At the same time if you neglected yourself and your fitness, now is the best time to bounce back. Hitting a gym with a best friend will make you look wonderful and bring back the confidence in you.

Do not let the breakup shatter the real you. Instead try your best and take help from family and friends, who help you get over turbulent times with their warmth and love.

Handle Your Relationship with Love and Care

It is very unusual for a couple to never have conflicts or disagreements. However, the way to solving a problem in your relationship is to understand the problem beforehand and try to prevent it from happening at all.



If you want to have a successful marriage or relationship and keep your lovelife going, you need to understand your partner from another perspective. Below is a list of the main relationship issues that many couples go through.

Communication

Whether you know it or not, the root cause of many broken relationships is simply a lack of communication. Communication with your loved one doesn't need to be a dreaded task, sometimes just sprinkling a little bit of love on him/her is a good thing.

Maybe they have come back from a hard day’s work or a bad day even. When it is like this, only you can help take away all the pain and give your loved one the love they need and deserve. Sometimes the communication gap has been there for so long it can be difficult trying to break the ice. If you are in a situation like this, it may help to try one or more of the following suggestions:

Set a date to go out with your loved one. Ask them what suits them best, and book a table at their favorite restaurant. You could even spend time at home and just have a really healthy talk. But if you do not set a specific time and date, your special evening may never happen.

If you live together, try to limit your TV watching time. Generally, if you're focused on watching a TV show, you're not focused on bonding with your partner.

Turn your phones off or set them to vibrate mode so nothing interrupts the time you're spending together.

Handle Your Relationship with Love and Care 

If you have kids, you should probably wait until after you put them to bed or maybe send them over to a friend's house or ask a relative to watch them for you.

If you think your conversation could escalate to a fight or raised voices, it may be better to choose a public location like a restaurant, where there is less chance that anyone will create a scene. That way, you can easily talk things out in a quiet manner, and that can lead to a healthy conversation.

Always make sure when your partner is talking that you let them talk without interrupting. If this happens often in your relationship then maybe it is time for you to lay some rules down and change things.

When your partner is talking and you are having a healthy discussion, do not fidget because this only shows that you are not at all interested. Your body language should show your partner that you are truly interested in what he/she is saying.


Tips to solve problems

Be truthful about everything that is going on with you. Two people want to be together because they think they can be truthful and trust one another. Be very careful about breaking your loved one's trust because once broken it is very difficult to regain.

Sometimes money or financial issues is the main cause of conflict in your relationship. You probably share bills and expenditures with each other and something may have happened that has caused it to become a problem. It doesn't have to be a bad thing to share your money with your partner.


Try being there for one another; love is not just about being there only in the good times, but also in the bad. Love takes away all pain, just show some love wherever necessary and your relationship will bloom like a beautiful, healthy flower.

 

Is it Really Wise to Dive Back Into a Relationship with Your Ex?

The idea of getting back together with your ex probably seems like the perfect solution to your present state of heart and mind. The breakup is the root of all your problems and your pain at the moment. You believe that making up will be the perfect answer. It might even solve some of your problems by relieving your pain to the point where you can think  clearly. However, if you had waited that long before making up, what would those clearer thoughts have revealed about the breakup to begin with? Is getting back together with your ex really in your best interest? Consider these questions to help you decide.



Have You Grown from the Experience?

Not just the breakup. Have you grown from the relationship? How has loving your ex changed you for the better? For worse? Where do you want to go, on a personal level, from here? Is it somewhere your ex will be able to go with you? How have your dreams and plans for the future changed as a result of your relationship with your ex? Do you still have dreams you're working to achieve? Or, have you given them all up for the sake of practicality and expedience? What have you accomplished since becoming involved with your ex? Do you feel like you're a better person because you knew your ex?

Are Your Prepared to Put the Past Behind You?

The problems in your relationship don't go away just because you broke up and got back together. Wouldn't it be nice if it did work that way though! The truth is that the old baggage is waiting at the same door one of you stomped out of when the you-know-what hit the fan. If you don't resolve the issues that tore the two of you apart to begin with, they're going to cause problems again unless you've decided that you can really put them behind the two of you and move forward.

 Is it Really Wise to Dive Back Into a Relationship with Your Ex?

What Kinds of Changes are You Willing to Make to Make it Work?

Lasting relationships require work. It's as simple as that. You can't share a home and lead two separate lives. You can't go your separate ways and meet up when things are lonely or a little less hectic. You have to make time for each other and you have to do things together. More importantly, though, for the sake of saving your relationship, you both have to change in ways that bring you together rather than divide you.

If you're not willing to put the past behind you, make necessary changes, and aren't sure you've really grown from your time together, then why on earth are you fighting like mad to save the relationship? If you have positive answers to all these questions, then you'll need to follow a well-conceived plan of attack to get your ex to pay attention and really give you, and your relationship, a second chance.

Once a cheater always a cheater.

If you have ever been cheated on you know the emotional trauma that comes with it. Infidelity is one of the few mistakes in a relationship that is powerful enough to feel on a physical level. It is almost as if someone hit you in the gut with a big fist of disbelief.

Trust is a precious thing that you should treat with the utmost caution. It's kind of like the Humpty Dumpty of bonds in a relationship. People tend to toss it around without realizing how fragile it really is.

Once it breaks they realize how impossible it seems to be to put it back together. Make sure you only give your trust away to people you can rely on. If the person you want to give your trust to has already violated it once, don't hand it right back to them without making sure they will respect it.

So if someone is a cheater, will they always be one? It would be nice if there was a clear answer to this question. Unfortunately every person in the world is different. Some can change and commit themselves faithfully while others will eventually fall back into betrayal.

Don't let a simple apology and a seemingly sincere promise persuade you into taking someone back. There are things you can do to find out whether or not someone is capable of being trusted a second time.

The first and most important thing is to determine the reason your partner cheated in the first place. People cheat for a variety of reasons, some of which are clear indicators that it may happen again.

1. Lack Of Respect - Some people could care less about their partner's feelings or the commitment they shared. Did your partner cheat simply because they didn't respect you? Chances are if they cheated and show no remorse, they will continue to be unfaithful.

2. They Were Getting Little Attention - Sometimes when people aren't faithful to their partner it is because they want to get noticed. If someone is neglected for long enough, they might take drastic action to make things change. Many people end up finding out they played a major role in why their partner cheated.

Once a cheater always a cheater.

3. The Relationship Was Getting Boring - A lot of affairs take place just for the thrill factor. When a relationship gets boring and dull, people tend to look for excitement.

If you experienced a lack of intimacy and not enough positive interaction there is a good chance this is why your partner cheated.

These are just a few common reasons people cheat. It could be a lot more complicated and difficult to figure out for certain couples. Once you have the motives figured out you have to ask yourself one question: Can you change the reason? The answer to this question is the easiest way to determine whether or not more cheating could be in your future with this partner.

If you can't work together as a couple to fix the problem you are out of luck. As long as the problem persists you are bound to experience the same consequences.

There are a lot of people who foolishly think the problem will solve itself and end up falling into a reckless pattern of emotional discourse.

If you can work together to make changes there is hope, but it doesn't guarantee they will change. Proceed with caution before giving your trust back. Take things slow and pay great attention to the way your relationship is building back up.

Even if you feel comfortable with them again, you need to be positive they have earned your trust. Before you decide whether or not to give your trust back to someone, think about how you felt when you were betrayed.

It isn't something people like to remember, but it is important to know that it could happen again if they aren't careful enough.
 Sadly, the majority of relationships that ended because of a cheating partner are bound to fail. If the bond is strong enough however, there is no reason you can't work through it and find your way back to a happy couple again.

Relational Strain Caused by Finances

Money affects day to day life more than almost any other force. Religious texts and folk wisdom all speak to how money should be handled by individuals, couples and families. Talk to almost any couple, regardless of their financial standing, and they will likely confess the majority of their discussions center around money. Knowing the pitfalls of financial concerns brought about by this topic, couples need a solid game plan to navigate these choppy waters.

Talking About the Monster

Couples without any conversations about money matters find themselves either in large scale fights or dissolving under the grinding weight of its pressure. The worst course of action is never having a single serious conversation about finances. Everyone's upbringing, education and experience with money is different. This colors how they relate to all sorts of circumstances. Without knowing a partner's feelings about finances, one might accidentally violate a core belief damaging the relationship. The couple needs to determine what is important to them as a unit and how they are going to proceed. Without frank discussion, couples will never be able to move onto the next step.

Setting a Road Map

Planning sounds like the most boring way to address anything in a relationship. Funny thing about money is life presents unpredictable circumstances alone. In this modern age, a serious accident or fluctuations in industries bring about changes to a couple's financial standing. In light of vast uncertainty, making a plan and discussing the plan becomes more critical.

Budgeting: A map is easier to follow when things are set. That's why roads and landmarks do not change overnight. Think how much harder it would be to get to the office everyday if everything changed on a whim. The first budget is the hardest because no one wants to feel hemmed into a corner where they can not spend what they want for what they want. The important thing to remember about a budget is how it demonstrates what the couple holds the most dear because they are planning for a particular outcome whether saving for a house or planning for a big trip. Also, budgets are working documents. They can be changed based on goals, accurate data and unexpected changes.

Relational Strain Caused by Finances 

Deviating: With an established budget, a couple proves better able to steer toward a good opportunity when it presents itself. A great house becomes available before they expected, but the couple can see areas they can cut in the short term to help them reach a larger goal quicker. Those without a clear vision of the future or how they move toward it will not be able to pivot quickly enough and might miss out on an ideal situation.

Saying "No"

Talking and planning sound like challenging mental exercises, but the kind where both partners are on the same page. While true in theory, the greatest arguments come when a denial exists. We are hardwired to fight against hearing no. Tell a toddler in the grocery store they can not have a bag of candy at the check out. How do they respond? Do they wait to hear the wisdom against having too much sugar or how a meal is right around the corner? Hopefully, adults in such situations do better, but they tend to not like hearing no either. Here are some points that might help.

* Reminding each other of the end goal and not momentary want.
* Emphasizing the partnership and how both are working together.
* Offering to discuss it later when cooler heads return.

Partners don't want to say no to one another because they prefer to shower each other with love, acceptance and anything else the other wants. However, sometimes the kindest thing is not giving in because it would be the easier thing to do.

Money, thought challenging, brings opportunities. Couples who save for a trip can experience a location with less stress. Wrangling money matters within the confines of their relationship allows couples another area in which to communicate effectively and bring them closer. Draw nearer and have the tough discussions now. It will pay dividends in the future.

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Sex and Fidelity

Let’s face it: casual sex is everywhere. Sitcoms on television glorify the idea of sleeping with the boyfriend/girlfriend of the week, fiction books glamorize affairs and one-night stands, musicians pen ballads about the wonders of relationships based on physical attraction. 

Sex between consenting adults is perfectly accepted in society, until it happens between your spouse and another consenting adult. Suddenly that barroom pick-up line song takes on a whole new meaning when confronted with the reality that your spouse picked someone else up and took them home for their own episode of casual sex. Sex is (and should be) a sacred part of marriage.

Imagine if these were the vows during a wedding ceremony:

"I, (insert name), take you (spouse’s name) to be my lawfully wedded wife. I promise to love you, and cherish you, and will be faithful to you until I find someone more attractive. Then, I will probably have sex with them, but will still love you and cherish you. I may find someone else that I want to have sex with but don’t worry. You’re the most important one in my life."

No one would sign up for that kind of deal!

While study after study shows that a lack of sex is not the only reason a person cheats, it is definitely a factor in an affair. It is with good reason that a proactive approach to warding off an affair includes an active sex life: sex is important (not to mention fun).

Make sex a priority in your relationship. One woman, whose mom was trying to be helpful before her daughter’s wedding, told her to always have a load of laundry nearby that needs to be done. The implication being that if you can have an excuse to get out of sex, you should take it.

Sex and Fidelity

That kind of thinking is what helps to set the stage for infidelity later. Regardless of your sex life (or lack thereof) it’s never your fault if your spouse cheats. However, you stack the odds in your favor if the issue of sex is never an issue.

While we will leave the particulars of your sex life to you, there are a few pieces of advice we will give:

• More is better. Some couples commit to being intimate every day for a year. Some choose a shorter amount of time as a means to strengthen the marital bond. Talk together with your spouse and see if this is something that would be helpful in your relationship.

• Variety is nice. Try something new – a new location, a new position, a new outfit. You don’t have to go any shades of gray to have a sex life that is varied and exciting.

• Talking is good. Communication is a key component in a relationship – and is equally important within your sex life. Talk/text/email about how you’re looking forward to date night, how much your intimacy the night before meant to you, about how you got a new outfit that you can’t wait for him to see in bed tonight.

Sex is a powerful tool in your relationship – use it as a tool for good.

NEW! Now You Can Stop Your Separation, Divorce or Lovers Rejection…Even If Your Relation Seems Hopeless!

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

The Secret you need to know to reverse your separation! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!

Should You Even Try to Win Your Ex Back?

In the first few days, even weeks, after your breakup, the only thing you can think about is how to get your ex back. It's understandable. Depending on how long the two of you were together, you've shared a lot of life. It's hard to just walk away and pretend it never happened.

The odds are good that your ex isn't walking off unaffected either. The only real difference is that your ex has been thinking about this for a while. People don't walk away from long-term-relationships on a whim. In other words, your ex has had a little more time to deal with the emotional side of the decision than you have.

If you're struggling to decide if the right choice is to walk away or fight to get your ex back, these questions should help you decide.

Is the Love Still There?

This is a huge question you need to know the answer to before you make a single step to try and win your ex back. While you can only guess about how your ex really feels, you can, and should, explore your own feelings in depth before making your next move. If the love isn't really there, you should not waste your time and energy, or that of your ex, trying to rekindle something that's simply not there anymore.

Should You Even Try to Win Your Ex Back?

Is the Relationship You Had Truly Worth Rehashing?

Most relationships have their shares of ups and downs. Successful relationships have far more ups in them than downs. Take a look back over the course of your entire relationship. How do the ups compare to the downs for you? Were the good times really good? How bad were the darkest days? Are you willing to experience them again if necessary?

How far are You Really Willing to Go to Make It Work?

You must be willing to do whatever it takes to make it work in most cases for that to happen. Your ex is likely to throw in a few pitfalls and tests along the way, if he or she is even willing to give it a go. Be prepared for them and ready to ace them with flying colors. Don't even think about letting her see you sweat. But the willingness goes even deeper than passing a few tests. You must be willing to make a few vital changes for the sake of your relationship. But you won't often find out what they are until the moment arrives. Just be prepared. Some of the changes may not be all that simple to make.

Most importantly, however, is your willingness to be the one to wait. This is often the most difficult, and most necessary, part of winning back your ex. Waiting for the right moment, though, makes all the difference in the world. I can help you understand when that moment is and help you come up with the ideal strategy to turn it into a prime opportunity.

NEW! Now You Can Stop Your Separation, Divorce or Lovers Rejection…Even If Your Relation Seems Hopeless!

If you Want Him Back, I’ll show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your lover back in your arms – Especially if you are the only one trying…

The Secret you need to know to reverse your separation! From the man that has helped over 50 000 people in 77 countries to get back together again!